obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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