At least make sure they are 18
Why
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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