Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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