And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize