eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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