at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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