there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
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