Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
