Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
