You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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