I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
You're like the curious george of whores
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
