So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize