Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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