She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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