forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
