very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
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