Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
