We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize