Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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