I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
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