YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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