when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
