Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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