i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I'm bleeding and have questions
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
