The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're like a gay fantastic four
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize