Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
You smell like a Billy Joel song
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
