Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
