How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I have demons in me.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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