We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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