If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
