I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
should my penis look like a turkey
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
When did angry sex become our thing?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize