Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I want a musical about memes.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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