You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
