So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize