also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
