so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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