But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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