Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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