If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
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