Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
