i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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