first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Randomize
