i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize