The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
