I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
