"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
