would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize