I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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