somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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