We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize