spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
